Did Jesus Trick-or-Treat?

This Halloween, I thought it was important to remember the reason we celebrate this holy-day in the first place: Jesus Christ.

What a guy, right? We all know the story. All he wanted to do as a kid was go trick-or-treating with his friends, dressed as his favorite old testament character, but of course his "friend" Judas showed up wearing the same costume: Moses. The beard, the robe, the whole bit. When Jesus confronted him about it at Gethsemane playground, Judas strung him up on the tether ball pole and gave him a wedgie. What a jerk!

And that's why we celebrate Halloween. I think. So, on a day where we dress up like characters from both the real and fictional past, people we admire, revere, and completely idolize, I whipped up a little costume in tribute to the man himself: JC


















You would not BELIEVE the reactions I got from some people. While I went around giving out Nilla wafers, and drinking wine I had just made out of a bottle of Poland Spring, some people had some very not nice things to say to me.

"You just want people to say 'Oh My God' and you'll say 'WHAT!', like they were talking to you." Disgusting. That could not be further from the truth. I couldn't even think of that by myself.

"Blasphemy!" They cried.

"Blasphe-YOU!" I replied. "Don't make me tell my dad!"

Then there were the people who were too ashamed of me to even acknowledge me. Karen invited me to a costume party at the bakery she works at, but said I could not come dressed as Jesus because it was insulting. To whom? I told her I would show up and proclaim to everyone that I was there with Karen and she was my best friend.

"I'll deny I know you," she replied.

DE-NIED! Just like Jesus by Peter the Apostle. I always knew Karen was bad news.

It wasn't all bad though. At parties, everyone wanted a picture with the big guy. Banana....



















Aphrodite...















Hugh Hefner....















80s Aerobics Instructors...















Rainbow Witch (she asked for a blessing. Who am I to say no)...















And even the Incredible Hulk...





























Overall, I would say this has been one hell of a Halloween. I really let it sink in, you know, what this holiday means to me. And I discovered that, in the end, it means absolutely nothing except horror and chocolate. Like Easter. So get out there today, beg for candy, and remember the man who made it all possible.

Next year I might go as something a little more fun, because I'll tell ya that crown of thorns was not comfortable at ALL.















Maybe. We'll see.

Happy Halloween Everyone!

PS! VERY IMPORTANT! (not at all). My friend Julie submitted me for this silly Neutrogena promotion for men's shaving products. And now I want to win. So please go to www.shavehisface.com, select Boston University, and type in photo # 1206 and rate me a 5!!!!!!!!!!

-ev